“Hi, USA? It’s your old buddy, Pakistan!

“Osama bin Laden in our country? As if! Hmm, it’s really a mystery where he is … don’t you guys hate Iran? I mean he’s gotta be there, right? The guy’s an icon of religious tolerance; surely he could have overcome the centuries-old Sunni/Shi’a divide.

“No, of course that’s not ridiculous. Which one of us lives in this part of the world? Come on, trust me.

“That enormous secured compound built four years after 9/11 in the sizable city of Abbottabad, which also has a huge Pakistani army base and military academy? You mean the compound where they burn their trash, and some tall guy in a camo jacket keeps ordering dialysis treatments? What can I say, you know these kids and their McMansions! It’s like a regular fraternity party in there. Imagine the heating bill for that place, am I right or what?

“By the way, can you spare a few billion dollars again for military aid? It would totally help me out in fighting these terrorists, bro. For real, I got your back.

“You know, because you’re such a great friend, I’m going to treat you to a special deal at our new venture, ISI Used Cars — I just got this shipment of ’83 Yugos that purr like a kitten, and they have your name written all over them. Consider it a favor for letting those drone strikes slide!

“Alright, I gotta get going to my meeting with the Taliban … oh jeez, did I say Taliban? I meant to say Talleyrand — I’ve really gotten into Bourbon Restoration re-enactment, so I’m going to this conference for Congress of Vienna enthusiasts. Should be a ton of waistcoats up in there.

“But for real, bro — you’re my ace and I love you like a brother. We are totally tight allies, for real. Catch you on the flip – Pakistan out!”

“Why They Hate Us: Lessons from Civil War Reconstruction”, ForeignPolicy.com, Nov. 23, 2009

Although as the first commenter pointed out, the question is when it’s worthwhile to occupy another nation anyway. That’s the tricky part.

The hot-spot, Central Command phase of Barack Obama’s foreign-policy tour is winding down, and so far he seems to have hit all the right political notes. Hooping it up was a particularly swift move, but even more fortunate was the fact that Iraqi prime minister Nouri al-Maliki came right out and supported a timetable for withdrawal nearly in line with Obama’s 16-month plan. There’s plenty to the argument against a timetable and the realpolitik strategic importance of Iraq over Afghanistan, particularly the fact that the Iraqi Sunnis don’t support a timetable, but from a political point-scoring perspective that’s a little irrelevant. Arguments from McCain or Bush against an American-favored Iraqi leader’s statements about what’s best for his own country are now going to face criticisms of tone-deafness and arrogance.

I don’t envy anyone making the Israel / Palestinian political trip, but I think the best Obama can hope for is to play perhaps the only role that America can play towards Israel to improve the situation: that of the friend who takes the keys when someone’s too wasted to realize he’s going to mess himself up if he keeps going.

But to bring things back to the title: it’s still summertime, the public and the media have long since put the blinders on for Iraq and Afghanistan, and most voters are on a break until the real campaign starts with the fall. Obama managed to score himself plenty of presidential-looking video filler for newscasts about his foreign-policy experience this fall, and that likely counts for more with the TV-influenced voting public than anything else on this trip.

Battle Company Is Out There

It’s very heavy, but gripping. I’ve read a few people complaining that it’s biased or gives an incomplete picture of the war, but that’s not what it’s about; it’s a piece about one particular piece of the Army in one particular part of Afghanistan, and does a great job of painting that with a sympathetic eye toward the soldiers. Endorsed by my friend Jeff, recently of the Army himself.